Last night in a debrief post-reading, I spoke to the abundance of time. That if you had more time, you had abundance, because there’s enough time to acquire whatever it is you’re calling in for yourself. Today, as I sat with an anxious buzz in my body awaiting the work that is certainly coming for me in just a few days, I realized how hard it was for me to walk the talk. I slowly but surely; however, have been working on that lesson, and every month I return to the pause at some point, and lean in to the enjoyment of it more.
It happens for different reasons. Sometimes, it’s a pause before a big trip. When a long drive is coming, but it’s not time to leave yet. And it’s as if I have to force myself to just go about a normal routine. I’ve even gone so far as to say I am busy “prepping for my trip” when offered plans, even though I most definitely won’t be packing until the night before, as per my usual. Sometimes, it’s financial, like when I was waiting for the settlement check after my car accident, not wanting to make ANY purchases or even planning for them until the check was in my hand, and turning down lots of plans using the scarcity mindset excuse of not affording it.
But as of more recently, I have been determined to not just practice the pause, but to view it as a gift. A gift of time, our most abundant currency. And a month ago, I decided to use that anxious buzz as fuel, and channel it into some writing. Hence, this Journal was born!
Every challenge I have faced in the past has been destined: for me to learn a lesson and end up not only where I am, but also where I am headed. I truly believe that. That belief has shaped how I now approach challenging times (or at least try very hard to.) My daily journal entries help me stay present, and not avoidant. But the long form writing, not just for me but shared with the world, that’s new. It’s proof that I can not only be patient in the pause, but I can create something out of it.
Emotions inform us of what matters and illuminate where our brain likes to go when it idles. How often are we ignoring them, and therefore bypassing things that really matter?
As I sit with the anxiety of proving myself to myself and the world in this busy Halloween season as a psychic reader, I recognize how far I have come. My lifestyle is rooted in purpose, and I am dedicated to an aligned schedule. Aligned in mind, body and spirit. That lifestyle is often a direct conflict with the world outside of my little bubble. And sometimes, the friction of that conflict results in the ego rearing its head.
But as I love to do for my clients, I take this realization and I look for a way to reframe it. So, here’s what I’ve come up with:
I am so very grateful to be both within the world of ego, embracing the human experience, and simultaneously behind the forcefield of my connection to source, protected by the ability to hop right back into my bubble with a little bit of effort.
This isn’t very much of a story, moreso a stream of consciousness. But it feels good to get it out, nonetheless.
If you’ve been sitting with an anxious feeling, or in the midst of a pause, I hope you find ways to root down, and enjoy this moment in time. One day you’ll reflect on it and see its purpose. For now, there’s magic in the unknown. Oh, and that anxious buzz? It’s temporary, but it’s energy, and you can find a way to transmute it. ‘Til next time, friends.